I Feel Like Delilah

I'm so glad you are here! I hope during your visit you get a glimpse of God's heart for we become what we are gazing at. I want to be a blessing to you so I've made these Resources available to you and have the Missional blog tab for practical ideas of how to live on mission right where you are. 

Currently I am writing my way through Judges sharing glimpses of God's heart and character for a weekday devotional. To check out the entire series so far head on over the the Judges Devotional. And if you are a blogger, come on over on Friday's for a blog hop.   


So here's my hot husband. (And super wise) This picture was taken at the lodge we got married at over 10 years ago. When we met, Austin had long hair and no goatee. He cut his hair right before our wedding and started growing the goatee about 3 years ago. I wish I could say I was a fan of facial hair. 

And really for 3 years I haven't really complained that much about it. And finally on Valentine's day he surprised me at our student ministry weekly meeting by serinading me with a nice shaved face. It was awesome!

But to Asher and Uriah's delight he started growing it back the next day. It was a treat while it lasted. But this morning when I answered the skype to talk to him from Cambodia I get the shock of all shocks. He is half shaved! The mustache! The worst of all facial hair! He has a mustache!! I mean seriously, if something is spelled must ache, how in the world can it be good? So the first thing to fall out of my mouth was, "Ah, gross! If you come home with that thing on your face I'm going to shave it off in the middle of the night." I was kidding, kind of.

And then the Lord reminds me what I had read not 20 minutes earlier. Samson and Delilah

"Some time later, he fell in love with a woman in the Valley of Sorek whose name was Delilah. The rulers of the Philistines went to her and said, "See if you can lure him into showing you the secret of his great strength and how we can overpower him so we may tie him up and subdue him. Each one of us will give you eleven hundred shekels of silver." So Delilah said to Samson, "Tell me the secret of your great strength and how you can be tied up and subdued." Samson answered her, "If anyone ties me with seven fresh thongs that have not been dried, I'll become as weak as any other man." Then the rulers of the Philistines brought her seven fresh thongs that had not been dried, and she tied him with them. With men hidden in the room, she called to him, "Samson, the Philistines are upon you!" But he snapped the thongs as easily as a piece of string snaps when it comes close to a flame. So the secret of his strength was not discovered. Then Delilah said to Samson, "You have made a fool of me; you lied to me. Come now, tell me how you can be tied." Judges 16:4-10

And while I read I was stuck by a few striking contrasts of the Proverbs 31 woman. Prov. 11-12 say, "Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life." 

At first Samson didn't tell his wife the source of his strength. But really shouldn't she already know that? I guess they weren't really that close and he apparently didn't think his Nazarite vow was anything worth talking about. He didn't tell her. That shows he didn't trust her. Perhaps it's because he had trust issues or maybe it's because she wasn't worthy of his trust. (I think both.) Maybe she criticized and belittled him and he didn't feel safe to expose his heart. A glaring opposite of the wife King Lemuel's mom tells him to look for in Proverbs 31, a lady he can fully trust. 

This wife of noble character also brings her husband good, another glaring opposite from Delilah. Delilah spent her time and energy on deceiving her husband for her own pleasure. So she could get money so she could get more stuff for her own pleasure without concern for him. 

That's when the brick hit me in the face. Do my spending habits line up with having Austin's good in mind? Ouch. Let me explain. We do the good old fashioned envelope system and Austin is the bookkeeper. I tried it once and it was a disaster. So he organizes all our budgeted money into envelopes each month. But sometimes, especially when he is away, I can adjust the envelops or get confused on what I'm suppose to do when I'm grocery shopping and can't find the grocery envelope. And let me just say that at that moment when I just stood in line for 15 minutes with 3 antsy kids 4 and under I am not thinking about what's good for Austin. 

Convicted.

And then this morning I actually tell him I'm going to shave his face. 
Oh my. 

So here's my heart and life. Hope you get a glimpse of how much I need Jesus, because really, I doubt God has ever convicted you of being a Delilah. ;)  And I hope you also get a glimpse of how incredible God's grace is, sufficient for all our needs.  

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