 Recently, God and I had a conversation about mentoring. He told me I needed to be a mentor. And, I said, No thanks, not qualified for that position. The conversation continued for a few months, with the responses being the same on each side, until I finally couldn't take it anymore. I accepted the challenge, despite my growing uneasiness over my lack of experience or knowledge in the mentoring department. I had never been a mentor before. I had never even been mentored. So, I asked a friend who is passionate about discipleship for some book recommendations on the topic. Each of the books he suggested sounded great, in theory. But, they were all written by men, seemingly for men. While I skimmed the reviews and read the back covers, I recognized that I needed a feminine voice. I needed to read a book by a woman, for women, about mentoring women. I stumbled upon Transforming Together: Authentic Spiritual Mentoring by Ele Parrott. At only 176 pages, this is a quick and easy read, that provides a general framework for what it looks like to be a mentor. My greatest takeaway from the book was Parrott's definition of spiritual mentoring: "Coming alongside of and partnering with who the Holy Spirit is being in the life of another person and infusing truth into that person's reality." {p.41} Parrott helped me to understand that being a mentor isn't about me. It's not a time for me to verbally vomit all of my mistakes and experiences. It's actually the opposite. My role is to actively listen, offer insight, and ask questions that allow the mentee to reflect on her experiences with a fresh perspective. I don't have to worry about saying the right things or giving the best advice. This is simply an opportunity for me to walk alongside a sister in Christ in her journey of faith. Transforming Together does not provide a list of questions or a discussion guide for your mentoring meetings. Instead, Parrott points you to Jesus and His example. She writes, We notice Him spending hours with others in their comfort zones. We see time set aside with a select few for more private and intimate conversations. We witness Jesus, the master spiritual mentor, asking significant questions and then waiting for responses-responses that revealed their hearts and gave Jesus the opportunity to speak truth into their realities. Parrott provides a plethora of personal examples from conversations in her own mentoring relationships. By sharing stories of women in a variety of life seasons, she shows us what it means to be a decidedly female mentor. I did struggle to translate those examples to my own mentoring relationship, precisely because each discussion is so relevant to an individual's experience. Parrott suggests numerous times that you meet at a Starbucks for mentoring. I love me some Starbucks, but I think it's good to think outside the cafe culture and explore other options for your meetings. Perhaps you could go on a walk, meet at a park, or even invite the mentee into your home. Transforming Together provides a great jumping off point from which to begin a mentoring relationship. But, most importantly, Parrott directs you to walk out your mentoring relationship in congruence with the Holy Spirit. Once you've got that down, you'll be amazed at how transformative mentoring can be for both you and the mentee. New here? Head on over to the Home page to see what we're all about. Follow via email (we send a short recap of all the articles to your inbox once a week) to be entered in the monthly giveaways and like on facebook for daily encouraging verses and memes. About Keri Most days Keri can be found cruising in her Swagger Wagon, reading a good book, or laughing with friends over large cups of coffee. She finds great fulfillment in serving those who might not walk through the doors of a church, but still desperately need the Hope that only God can give. She also enjoys learning about God through unorthodox means, and occasionally blogs about it at Pop Parables. She also gets in touch with her creative side at BringingCraftyBack. Keri lives in the Greater Seattle area with her husband, their three boys, and 2 weiner pups.
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