The Adventure of Ministry and Marriage-The Story of the Mattress

When I think about our journey in ministry, I think about the mattress we bought when we were first married.  We NEEDED a new mattress and when my husband called from the store to say there was a really good deal on a king-sized one, I said, ‘No way!’ As in ‘NO WAY are we going to buy something that big!’ And then I went to the store and saw the amazing deal {70% off, I think} and also saw how my husband’s feet hung off the end of the full size mattress which was the only other option that we could afford.

So I said ‘yes’. 

The mattress came home and was shoved up a narrow staircase with the might of three men to our first loft-type bedroom.  One year later it was transported to the apartment on the other side. Then it was stored at my in-laws townhouse while we were on our first internship in Hungary.  It moved briefly to a neighbor’s and then came back to my in-laws when we returned from Hungary and lived with them to raise our initial missionary support. It made the journey in a U-haul to Florida where we lived for close to three years and was placed in storage in June of 2011 and was shipped to Newark, NJ until eventually it made its big sea voyage to Europe and finally Budapest where it resides happily today J

We really love that mattress AND we really love the calling God has placed on our lives. BUT, both the mattress and the calling were a surprise and we would probably not have picked something so large if we knew, then, the journey the mattress {or we} would take.

I had sensed the Lord’s calling on my own life in profound ways while I was still single and living states away from my future husband.  He had sensed something similar.  But, when we met, fell in love, and married that had all been surrendered as several things had broken and humbled each of us.  We only wanted to be faithful with each day and leave the future in the Lord’s hands.

Shortly after we were married we first heard about the amazing opportunities to work with public school students in Hungary.  I was teaching high school math and my husband was working at a bank, but there was something magical for both of us about this ministry.  I am the natural visionary, and as we lived the first couple years of our marriage, I kept being touched with the picture of how incredible it would be if we took the leap of faith and worked with the ministry there. I kept mentioning it to him and he was always open and excited. So mountains were moved and we went.

That year quickly confirmed that there was no other life work that could better fit Jared and I knew, before God, as his wife, I could not let him choose any other path.

We are now nine years into this journey and have moved eight times, had three children in three very different places, traveled back to Hungary for two summers and spent close to three years raising ministry support full-time until we eventually saw the dream of long-term ministry in Hungary fulfilled.  Through it all, I have been amazed to see how God has worked in us beyond our wildest dreams, mostly, to give us a life where we desperately need Him.

But, I have also struggled a great deal with my place in this journey.  I have ridden the waves of my own insecurities that have surfaced during our uprooting and with the deep changes that come with parenthood.

In my weakest moments, I doubt the Lord and am sure He could have chosen someone better to walk alongside this amazing man, who is my husband.

But the Lord, and my beloved, affirm me with assurances of this journey that are a lot like the purchase of that mattress.

First, it is ours (my husband and mine), not his, and I didn’t accidentally end up owning it with him. It is a little bent from that first traumatic move and scuffed from the subsequent ones, just like we are.  It has taken a beating from the little feet that find joy jumping up and down on it and our kids have certainly humbled and shaped us too. 

No matter what it has looked like, from the first days of our marriage, we have loved that mattress and our journey together.  It fits us perfectly, just like our calling.  And I remember that every fiber and step are a gift from our gracious God and that my beloved husband would NEVER want to share it with anyone but me.

The more we walk in ministry together, we embrace it as an adventure. There is tremendous provision and comfort, practically in things like our mattress. But when we travel (we are in the middle of three months of international travel) and don’t have our usual comforts, we press deeper into the Love that is holding us tight together as He carries us Home.

About Abby

I am wife to a wonderful man, mama to three precious now-little-but-soon-will-not-be loves. Each born in a different place--two states including 2 states and 2 countries. I am a farm girl who found her heart in the city. I can now claim fluency in 3 languages :: English, Spanish & Hungarian.This combined with the all-too-true 'mommy brain' explains much regarding my mental state most days;) I am a sojourner longing for Home. Yet, in my messy and broken, I embrace the moments given with all I have. I am seeking, praying, and learning again and again that it is for His Glory I live. My prayer is that my little life would make much of Him! I write regularly at Abigail Alleman.

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