Are you too hard on yourself?
I have a feeling that I am not the only woman who has a list of things I wish I wouldn’t have done, or said, or thought in my life. Sometimes my mind will suddenly remind me of something I did back in middle school and I start beating myself up mentally for it yelling silently “why did I do that”, “what was I thinking” then insecurity and lack of confidence sets in.
God can deliver you from being too hard on yourself, and he desperately wants to remind you of His strength being made perfect in your weakness. You have weaknesses, we all do, in fact we all say and do things we wish we wouldn’t have on a daily basis. However when you allow your mind to consume you with criticisms you slide into self-defeat and ultimately a self-consumption of you and only you. Instead of thinking how others might be feeling you begin thinking how you are feeling. Usually, at least in my case, my prayer life would even be flooded with prayers about myself and my failures, not the needs of people around me.
Finally I had to come to a point where I was ready to stop wishing I could change the past. It’s impossible for us to change the past and what we have done, but God can make all things work together for good – including our mistakes.
Perhaps you are hard on yourself for something you said or did to someone, if this is the case you can do the right thing by asking for their forgiveness, forgive yourself and move forward. You can start being easier on yourself as you let God begin to release you from the bondage of holding yourself hostage in the past. He will release you and show you how you can move forward.
I also bet I am not the only woman who is quicker to forgive others than myself. It was powerful for me to realize that by not forgiving myself for my mistakes, I was being prideful and having a hardened heart. If I believe God has forgiven me and covered all my sins but refuse to forgive myself, I am fighting against Him who died to set me free! He wants to set me free, he died for that, so I need be willing to help him in the process of making me more and more like Him.
As I worked through my negative self-talk and harsh criticisms I began to rely more and more on God’s promises. I don’t have to think constantly about what I could have done but rather what God has done in my life! That is the key I have found – think about what God has done in your life and what he is continuing to do. You may have a long way to go but thank God you are moving forward!
Hope McCleary graduated from Mesa State College with a degree in Mass Communications. After graduating she spent two years working in local news at KKCO 11 News in Grand Junction, Co. She decided to give up her career in the media to share the message of Christ full-time. She joined full-time staff with Master Plan Ministries the summer of 2012 and got married to Forrest McCleary in September of 2012. Through her own personal ups and downs in college Hope has a heart for college women understand their worth as God’s daughters, to see them grow in their faith, to grow in the unique gifts God has given them, and to stand firm in their faith even with the pressures of the world all around them. Hope’s interests include world and local missions, photography, singing, playing guitar and writing music, reading, meeting new people, coffee, and hiking.
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2/20/2013 06:55:43 am
Enjoyed this very much, I believe we all struggle with this daily, tell ourselves "no more will I let this bother me" but we still struggle, praise God for his infinite mercy, love and strength. Knowing we are forgiven is the key, isn't it? Daily reminders in the word also help.
2/20/2013 10:09:33 pm
You are a gifted writer, Hope. And your article speaks great truths. As Joyce Meyer's always says: "I'm not where I need to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be." Only God can truly transform a life from the inside out. So thankful He is a merciful God. :)
2/24/2013 12:19:22 pm
Love this!! Makes me think of Romans 8:1...
2/25/2013 01:04:29 am
Glad you're in our Christian Poets & Writers group on Facebook. Saw your link and posted the URL on the blog - http://christianpoetsandwriters.blogspot.com/. May God bless this good word and good work in you in Jesus' Name.
You are right. This is a message for all women. I know it is for me. I tell myself that I've forgiven myself for all the stupid things I've done in the past, but before I know it, I'm thinking about something and asking forgiveness for it again when I know it has been dealt with. Thank you for this reminder not to be too hard on ourselves.
2/10/2015 03:05:50 am
Just what I needed. Such a blessing this piece of writing. Thank you for writing it. Glory to God who's good.
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