My Kids Behavior Is Not About Me
Every day when I pick Shelby up from school, the first think I say is “Hey sweet girl how was your day?” And her response is always the same.... “Pretty good I got a blue” (or some other color).
Shelby’s school uses a color chart for behavior where green, blue, purple and pink mean they had good-outstanding days and yellow, orange and red men they had challenging days. I like it because it gives me a bit of a gauge of how she did on each given day.
So anyway, she tells me her color and then I always say some variation of the same thing “But how else was your day? Did you have fun? What was your favorite thing?” You wanna know why I ask that? Because I don’t just want to know how Shelby measures on a color chart, but also how she felt that day... what she did... who she talked to etc.
"Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh?" Galatians 3:3
Legalism runs in our veins. It is so easy to try to please God by what we DO (in the flesh), thinking that somehow we will be just a little more pleasing in His sight if our day is a purple. But the truth is, God knows us... and our acceptance comes just through knowing Him through His son, not by performance.
As parents, we have an opportunity to show our kids what the love of God looks like. Not acceptance through performance, but simple acceptance based purely on the fact that they are ours... just as we are His.
I believe we have the chance to help mold not just how our kids look at the themselves, but also how they look at others. If they are measuring themselves only by the color chart, then chances are, they will also measure others by the color chart or what they do.
I want my kids to think eternally when it comes to others and be able to share the love, forgiveness and acceptance of Jesus with their friends.
My kids’ behavior is not about me. It’s not about if I’m embarrassed if they get a Red every day. It’s not about if I’m proud If they get a pink every day. It’s about the grace of God. It’s about showing my kids the grace of God. It’s about accepting my kids. And it’s about my kids showing others that same grace and acceptance.
It’s about Jesus- who never had a sinful day... who on the color chart only would have gotten pink! And us teaching our kids that through Jesus, God sees our days at pink every day.
Check out the rest of the Not About Me November Series
Rhonda attended Oklahoma Baptist University for two years until she felt called to reach out to a secular campus. She then transferred to Mesa State where she graduated in 2004 with a B.A. in Counseling Psychology. She now serves as a missionary to college students and has a passion for reaching out to young women. God has a purpose and design for who he wants Godly women to be, and Rhonda is excited about helping women find freedom and joy in His purpose.
Want to read more from this contributor? Put her name in the search box at the top.
Sharing this article over at these awesome blogs
11/21/2013 01:09:45 am
11/21/2013 01:09:01 am
Thank you! It's a good reminder for me too! I try to be accepted by God through my
11/21/2013 03:01:19 am
this was absolutely wonderful. Thank you for sharing and for the needed reminder.
11/21/2013 03:07:05 am
Thank you Katie!
11/21/2013 10:55:23 am
Amen to that! I try to constantly remind Shelby- like after discipline I might say something like 'does mommy only love you if you're perfect?'- anything to keep the dialogue going!
Leave a Reply.