To succeed at any great endeavor, you need to have a plan. Don’t you agree? For example, as a college student, I had a calendar, a course catalog, and a budget. I didn’t just show up to class and expect everything to fall into place. I made sure I had my textbooks purchased, and I had read the syllabus before day 1. I came with sharpened pencils and a nice notebook to take notes. I had my “game face on.”
The same preparation principle applies to almost everything I can think of – for example, running a marathon, spending a summer in Europe, and purchasing a home all require careful thought and a well-laid out plan.
Why then do we not understand that dating requires the same type of careful planning and preparation? When you meet the man of your dreams, you want to make sure that you have your “game face on.”
Dating success is more than just purchasing some cute outfits and making sure that your hair looks perfect. If you want to stay on mission, you need to have a plan.
My suggestion is that you get some new sharpened pencils and a notebook, and then sit down with your man over a cup of coffee to discuss what your mission is as a dating couple.
If you need some direction, my man and I would like to offer you some advice. Here are four key principles that helped guide our dating season that I think will be beneficial to you:
1. Serve Together – Life is not about you. It’s about Jesus. Whether you are single, dating, or married, we are here to “wash feet.” Your gifts and the gifts of your boyfriend will complement each other in a way that seems to make up two sides of a very nice coin. As you serve together through your dating season, you will learn how to work together to bring greater glory to God.
2. Study Together --- You don’t know everything. There is wisdom about life and dating and marriage that will benefit you in this season. Read a book together about relationships, communication, or spiritual gifts. Take that pre-marital class or attend that workshop that your church is offering. Get all the information you can, and then sit down and talk about what it means for you personally as a couple.
3. Seek Together – You aren’t supposed to spend every moment alone together. We are called to be in community – especially when we are dating. Join a small group Bible study with other couples, or go to dinner with another married couple who you admire. Ask questions, listen, watch, and pursue mentoring relationships and like-minded friends who are going to help make your relationship as a couple stronger.
4. Surrender Together – Spend time together with Christ. He is the center of your relationship, and as you pursue Him, you will draw closer together. Pray together out loud daily, read the Word together, and talk about how your relationship with Christ is changing.
The dating season is one of the most exciting times of life, but you need to prepare for success. If you plan and dedicate time toward growth, you will stay on mission and develop a strong spiritual foundation as a couple.
Lyli Dunbar loves teaching. For 17 years, she mentored teenagers in the Christian school setting, and now she has serves as Associate Director of Curriculum at Trinity International University Florida. Lyli married her Prince Charming in her 40’s and has a heart for encouraging young couples and singles in God’s waiting room. She enjoys road trips with her husband, connecting with women through Bible study, and reading way too many books. Lyli writes about life lessons and faith on herpersonal blog. You may also connect with her on Facebook,Twitter, and Pinterest.
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