I have described true vulnerability like being a filleted fish. Your outsides look completely different from your insides. Your insides are soft and fleshy while your outside is tough and scaly. And when you cut into that, this totally different, smelly side of you is expose to someone else. Your guts (not exactly your most attractive parts) spilling out of you – how is someone else suppose to respond to that??
The follow reasons is why opening up to others sucks:
- It doesn’t feel good being cut into
- You have to admit to your actual thoughts and feelings
- Sugar sprinkles don’t make fish guts taste better (Think about it, does sugar coating sin ever make the situation better? Not really…)
And you want to know the top reason why being real with others really sucks?
The other person’s response.
What if they judge you for your past/present circumstance? What if they never want to talk to you again? What if they label you something like The Overly Emotional Friend or The Touchy-Feely One? What if they tell you that you should hide what you just told them? What if they reject what you’re saying as true? What if they tell you the TRUTH (*GASP*) about what you’re doing is wrong or not? What if they share it with others? What if your secrets are exposed to everyone, and then other hear it wrong and then your life is now a game of rumor telephone?
Yep. The worst part about real vulnerability boils down to all the “what ifs” we roll around in our minds like old cud in a cow’s mouth. And to be honest and fair, sometimes those “what ifs” do happen. Sometimes people don’t respond the way we need them to. Sometimes people end up sharing your life to the local rumor mill.
So is vulnerability still worth it, even though it can suck?
(Those with a fear of vulnerability just cringed in their soul.)
Being truthful about yourself with others is amazing because of the following reasons:
- You get to share the real you with others, which makes the real you come out in all other areas of life.
- You learn what God’s grace truly looks like, and appreciate the Gospel more
- You find healing in the Light of Christ
- You learn what people really, truly think about you and your sin. Which, more often than not, is not what the “what ifs” that were keeping you from sharing in the first place.
Why are all these things so important? Because….
The REAL You + a healing you + reality from others + more love for the Good News of Jesus = A Missional Woman ready to live out the Great Commission
Dear Lord Jesus, Please help me to not live in fear, “what ifs”, or complacency about my struggles and sin. Help me to reach out and share what is really going on in my life. Let me be filled with Your Holy Spirit to do the seemingly impossible tasks You’ve called me to, including living in the light and bearing my innards to others. In Your Name I pray…
Leah works with Master Plan Ministries at Fort Lewis College in Durango, CO. Other than watching college students' lives change, she enjoys getting her mind blown by God and His Word, watching sci fi, baking cupcakes, and spending time with her hunky husband.
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